| The Trial
Life is a trial,
and I plead innocence.
And I can’t seem to find
a witness to my defense
File in singly
A jury of my peers:
A hip monk, road hog
Couch potato
Kama sutra rock-the-cradle-it’s-muhammad-ali-docious
…yeah, yeah . . .
My advocate
is like something from a dream.
He wears a raspberry beret, ends every sentence the same
“If it please the court and Julian Bream
File in singly
A jury of my fears
Alpha, beta, o mega-bass
Kama sutra rock-the-cradle-it’s-muhammad-ali-docious
…yeah, yeah . . .
Life is a trial
and I plead innocence
And I can’t seem to find
A witness for my defense
The judge demanded
That I sing the raven’s song
To a tiding of magpies, a murder of crows, a parliament of rooks
My voice gave out before too long
File in one by one
A jury of ideas
(A line I haven’t written yet)
Kama sutra cali-pointilistic-mononucleosis
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Washes His Hands
There’s a definite gleam in his eye
A reassuring beam when he smiles
You would trust him with your car
Your watch, your minibar
There’s a soothing quality to his voice
Lull you to sleep, it’s a comforting noise
When he laughs you laugh with him
‘cos he’s got that kind of charm
And though he never, ever means to do harm
As soon as he washes his hands, they’re dirty again
There’s a mischievous twist to his lips
Irresistable grin—it’s just like a kiss
He could charm the pants right off you
And charm them right back on
And though he never, ever means to do harm
As soon as he washes his hands, they’re dirty again
And he never stays long
‘Cos it would only go wrong
Always leaves them wanting more
‘Cos he always leaves them
Mischievous twist to his lips
Irresistable grin—it’s just like a kiss
He could charm the pants right off you
And charm them right back on
And though he never, ever means to do harm
As soon as he washes his hands…..they’re dirty again
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Crowd Control
Weapons of mass destruction:
Cheesburger and fries
Blow up a whole nation
Change the system from inside
Before you know it we scale the McWall of China
Storm the Taj Mahal
We’re everywhere and we’re nowhere
Tricks of the trade, American made
Crowd Control
Weapons of mass destruction
The global coffee bar
Per(k)fect proliferation
From Beijing to Kandahar
Before you know it we fix the Sphinx’s nose
And we billboard the Wailing Wall
We’re everywhere and we’re nowhere
Tricks of the trade, American made
Crowd Control
God bless the boilermaker
When no one wants it hot
God bless the wedding baker
When no one ties the knot
I see, said the blind man
I saw, said the carpenter
I sew, said the sweatshop worker
I sue, said the lawyer—and he’s a destroyer
Weapons of mass destruction
The deadly Crispy Crème®
Insidious confection
More destructive than they seem
Before you know it we scale the McWall of China
Storm the Taj Mahal
We’re everyone and we’re no one
Tricks of the trade, American made
Crowd Control
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Unforgiven
She—see her in her corner seat
She—taciturn and in retreat
She—escape is within easy reach
But you don’t want to think about that
You want her under your thumb
Or under your heel
It seems to me
You like her to be unforgiven
It’s unforgivable
She—wants so much to put things right
She—is reeling from that bitter fight
She—will probably toss & turn all night
But you don’t want to think about that
You want her right where she is
Too numb to feel
It seems to me
You like it when she’s unforgiven
It’s unforgivable
You think that she will stay
If you hold her in your sway
You don’t want her strong
You think she’ll belong
If you tell her everything she does is wrong…
But you don’t want to think about that
You want her right where she is
Too numb to feel
It seems to me
You need her to be unforgiven
It’s unforgivable
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Fender Bender
I’m temperamental
Very experimental
I like your karma
God knows I wancha
Ever since I metcha
Feel I’m on the right path
I’m like a shower and you
You’re more like a bath
I can’t remember
A fenderbender
That I’ve enjoyed so
You make my glass glow
Ever since I metcha
Feel I’m on the right path
I’m like a shower and you
You’re more like a bath
Take me in your charms
Thrill me with all of your arms
Do you September
That weekend in remember
I love me
You love you too
This thing is getting closer every day
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Hard to Know
She’s never been comfortable with compliments
If you watch her closely, you can almost see her wince
And while she doesn’t accept them
She’s found that she can deflect them
And most people won’t see a difference
She’s never been one to smile for flatter
Her usual response is “baby, change that battery”
Most people think she’s sweet
She likes to keep things
Nice and neat
No one’s gonna mess up or around with her orderly life
She’s got all her ducks in a row
She’s not hard to like
But she’s hard to know
She’s not the kind of girl who reveals a lot
She leaves work at work at 5 o’clock on the dot
At home, turns on the TV
‘Cos that’s her idea of
Company
No one’s gonna mess up or around with her orderly life
She’s got all her ducks in a row
She’s not hard to like
But she’s hard to know
And if she likes you
She’ll let you see
Just enough for you to
Know that she
Really, really doesn’t
Want or need
Someone in her business
Or you might be a witness
To a chapter or verse
That she hasn’t rehearsed
No one’s gonna mess up or around with her orderly life
She’s got all her ducks in a row
She’s not hard to like
But she’s hard to know
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Here, My Dear
Dear
It’s been over a year
And by now it should clear
You have nothing to fear
C’mere
Your makeup’s starting to smear
From your mouth to my ear
I don’t think I can steer
Anymore
I cannot wait for what’s in store
You never bore
And you adore me
Sincere
You’re like a gala premiere
And I volunteer
To be the one to fill you with cheer
We chip away the veneer
We could make a career
Of longing looks that bring a tear
To the eye
You never try
You’re never dry
I can’t deny
You won’t deny me
You satisfy me
Mere
Mortals could never summon the leer
I put on when you’re in something sheer
Butterflies get me feeling so queer
I feel the emptiness disappear
When you lovingly interfere
I’m like a car that you commandeer
And you put me in gear…
You satisfy me
You satisfy me
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Hildegard
The way you move
A flower of passion
Your dazzling view
Caress of creation
Devotion…
You never sprang from the dew
Or from the rain,
My blossom
Distilled in the sun
Your scent is like balsam
Fragrant and warm
The banquet is ready
Ready…
You never sprang from the dew
Or from the rain,
My blossom
That was no wind swept over you
How to explain
That awakening
My darling Hildegard
You are much more than bard
You were a renaissance woman
before it had a chance to
Start—the renaissance, I mean
Art—an abbess, I guess your
Heart—is spoken for
You never sprang from the dew
Or from the rain,
My blossom
That was no wind swept over you
How to explain
That awakening
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Wendy (Blow You Away)
Well, you walk the earth
But you’re divine
I’ve studied every curve
Every line
‘cos there’s nothing I wouldn’t do
Side by side
I feel such peace
You’re got the greatest legs
Since Cyd Charisse
Your hand caress
With a dulcet touch
Please stop me now
Before I say too much
‘cos there’s nothing I wouldn’t do
I’ll give you a kiss that’ll make you sigh
Run my fingertips up and down your thigh
I’ll do it all just to hear you say
“You blow me away”—blow you away
Well, you walk the earth
But you’re divine
I’ve studied every curve
But I love your mind
I want to know you, babe
Inside and out
I want to kiss you, babe
I’ll start with your mouth
‘cos there’s nothing I wouldn’t do
I’ll give you a kiss that’ll make you sigh
Run my fingertips up and down your thigh
I’ll do it all just to hear you say
“You blow me away”
Wendy
Blow you away, Wendy
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Out on the Road
Out on the road in the middle of nowhere
Where there’s nothing to do but speed
And I’m trying to unwind the difference
Between what I want and what I need
The only reason I came out here in the first place
Is that everything’s going too well
When it all starts to fall into place
When it all starts to get in my face
I want to shoot myself down the middle of the canyon
I want to crash into some tumbleweeds
Maybe I should be the man shot out of the cannon
Maybe then I’d know what I want is not what I need
The only reason I came out here in the first place
Is that everything’s going too well
When it all starts to fall into place
When everyone’s nice to my face
When they tell me I’m one lucky guy
And then laughingly call me ‘his highness’
I want to kill myself with kindness
I don’t know why I ran for the door
It was that or end up on the floor
Found my hands wrapped around a wheel
So I don’t have to think or feel
And I don’t know where I’m gonna go
All I know is I’m
Out on the road in the middle of nowhere
Where there’s nothing to do but drive really fast
And I’m trying to walk a very fine line
Between being in pain and being a pain in the ass
The only reason I came out here in the first place
Is that everything’s going so well
When it all starts to fall into place
When everyone’s nice to my face
When they tell me I’m one lucky guy
And then laughingly call me ‘his whineness’
I’ve got to get out
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Is It Okay?
Is it okay with you that I think about you
all through the day
Is it okay with you that I contemplate
having my way
With you it’s often silly
Sometimes frilly, sometimes not
And I have to ask
Is it okay with you that I think about
The notes that you send
Is it okay with you that I don’t mind saying
“you win again”
With you it’s delightful
Never spiteful, it’s what you’ve got
And I have to ask
Is it okay with you?
Is it okay with you that I picture you
In tear-away suits
Is it okay with you that I think about
What’s in those boots
With you it’s so funny
Sometimes sunny, always hot
And I have to ask
Is it okay with you?
It’s not that I seek permission
‘Cos what you’re dishin’
I love to take it
I only intend to show you
How well I know you
So we can make it
Through the june-in-moon
The cow-and-spoon
The tune I croon
Is careeing
Caressing
You’re dressing
I’m guessing that it’s time to ask
Is it okay with you?
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
Right Before My Eyes
Ooo, ooo, ooo
Ooo, ooo, ooo
I love the way you
Call my name
I love the way you
Shift the blame
When I saw you
Somehow I knew
Such a delight
You are so bright
And I was always wandering
Stumbling around
But then I found
What I was looking for
Right before my eyes
I love to heard the things you say
Under your breath
I love to hear you say
“You’ll catch your death”
When you saw me
I left my seat
When you said “Yes”
It was like a caress
And I was always wandering
Stumbling around
But then I found
What I was looking for
Right before my eyes
I love to see you buy
Another pair of shoes
I love the way it perks you up
And gives me views I can use (I can’t lose)
And I was always wandering
Stumbling around
But then I found
What I was looking for
Right before my eyes
©2007 Geoffrey Welchman
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